Sitting down for an exclusive interview with the Observer, Allen opened up about the terrifying experiences of the last several years, as well as what it feels like to now wait for final sentencing of Gray.
“It was freaking me out a bit and I’m not easily scared, so the fact I went to the police with the letters shows how serious I felt it was,” she told the paper. “Alarm bells were ringing. But I felt comforted by the fact that I was telling the police, I was keeping a record.”
Last October, Gray broke into her home when she and her children were sleeping: “This guy came steaming in and I didn’t know who he was. I recoiled and he ripped the duvet off, calling me a ‘fucking bitch’ and yelling about where his dad is.”
Unfortunately, the police didn’t act proactively and catching Gray and actually charging him was an excruciatingly slow process.
“It was not special attention I looked for. It was reassurance and validation. The police made me feel like a nuisance, rather than a victim. I feel lucky I had resources to protect myself, I could move house, get a lawyer, but if you don’t have that money, how much more terrifying must it be?” she added.
“I’m not angry at Alex Gray. He has a mental illness. The system has failed him. But until he gets the right treatment and the right help he needs, then I’m not safe. You can throw the book at him, put him in jail, but he’ll still be coming out. And the victim is never safe.”